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story:
shred shock
Shredding down this night sky,
something a little more than rain or snow,
she doesn't turn around. Not goodbye, not this time,
I know because when she really chooses something, she doesn't walk on her toes or on imaginary heels, but instead her small feet are planted before each step with no hesitation. This is rare, for she lived and moved by her own words: "If you step lightly, your less likely to fail and fall head first" and when she did, I'd always echo back,
" well if you too step lightly your less likely to do anything" Depending on the day, month or mood she'd pierce me with her wicked grin sharper than any stiletto shoe, or just laugh softly. The smile and laugh to destroy and recreate my world. Her feet rooted in my fate's destined plan, in a elegant gait, her naked spine and shoulders determined in a steady rhythm she is going, is leaving, and is not coming back. I thought, thought we could go together as we always did but not this time, our time ended.
but it's
Shredding down this little piece of night sky
Shattering rips in this little void that is me
its something a little more than rain or snow or any storm
it something a little more than grief or rage or any emotion.
shattering rips, do you know what i mean when i say
Shredded Shock factor
Motionless emotion, emotionless motion.
Nothing is left.
A kind of electrical shock to the point when it renders you frozen
internally and externally. Nothing is left because everything freezes into dust and it all falls away with no chance to realize it or accept it.
The night she found out, Shredded Shock coursed steadily through her
like patient death,
just as that night when time left.
Rage, grief, betrayal and hot hatred was her mind's first attempt in emotional survival. It failed. Then came denial. Denial never could keep her warm even now in her most desperate state. Denial depleting as the last of her body rejecting in spasms. But no matter how much i tried to comfort her, her eyes fell harder till they were ridged and dry. She ignored me and anyone else. She became shy distant angry fragile weak and introverted. She became all that she was not. This took me over the edge and pushed in an endless pit. Then our old days came clear through my mind, in my minds desperate need, reality left me, time meant nothing to me. I became engulfed by my stupor in my dreams,i slept. The primal came first and fast all at once then it left. Her scent, the nature of her long red hair, the curves of her small feminine frame and how all seemed to fit. Just right like the sound of too puzzle pieces snapping into place with the sigh of completeness. The way she challenged and tempted me with the rise and fall of her eyebrows and intense stares. And oh that smile. The first time i met her, i couldnt stand her. The way she walked and the way she seemed to already know my truth before I did, that I loved her and feared loving her. When I met her i hide from her by trying to only see the surface of her and showing only my surface. That way I could hate her and she could hate me. I failed. Her eyes won and her eyebrows mocked me while her mouth told me the truth, all in a single unabashed kiss. I will never forget when i first saw her put her feet in the sand and her sudden giggles. I love her, I love her please give me back my time with her please. My dream cut off, something wasn't right, something had happened.
She did to me what was done to me that night,
my time stolen by a passing bullet to the head. That night came back to me in horror
a crazed scum had lusted for her as we passed his neighborhood, wanted to rape her
At the bottom of the ocean she brought me with her.
She had thrown away her time! Her life is gone. As I wait for her on the glaze of the ocean's skin. It all comes to an end and in the womb of the end is a unknown beginning,
she was gone maybe even waiting for me in another life i had to find her...
 Arayza · Sun Mar 21, 2010 @ 08:32am · 0 Comments |
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