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Okay, so today was crap. Well, I guess it was fine until we got home. I was up until like 3 in the morning talkin to Gil about the RP and waiting for more people post, which nobody did of course, but whatever. Gil's nice and a senior so if I become friends with him, hopefully I wont be bullied as much. Ah, hell. What am I saying? He's in drumline, I'm screwed. So anyway, I went to bed and I was kinda pissed because nobody bothered telling me when I needed to be up the next morning (I had to go to my grandmothers for lunch because it was Friday) and i totally forgot to ask, so I'm just like "If I wake up late, it's not my fault" because it totally wasnt. But I woke up by myself at 10 which gave me barely enough time to get ready, but we still mostly made it on time becuase we had to stop for gas anyway. Meh. But of course my molars clicked everytime I said something because of the new brackets they put on two days ago so my teeth were killing me. Which was okay, because the Club normally has New England Clam Chowered for one of the Soups of the Day. But of course this time they didnt. Sigh. And I really didnt want the fish and there wasnt anything else I could eat easily so I got a burger (again) and I know Nana wasnt too happy about that, and once I bit into it I wasnt very happy either. It wasnt that good. It lunch was okay. I never realize how much I'm faking my attitude around Nana until I get back into the car when we're ready to go home and let out a big sigh. But then we had to go 1. Tailors 2. TLC 3. T-mobile 4. Bank
And those were okay. T-mobile was kinda sucky for a while, but then we finally got somebody to pay attention to us and the lady that was talking to us was really nice and she knew a lot. And the deal that I'm going to get on my knew phone is really awesome!! But, of course, I have to buy the phone myself ($268 plus tax which would be 286.76) and pay for the unlimited internet, texting, and all the apps I buy. This is why it really pisses me off when Bailey wont shut-up about her phone. I mean, I love her and everything but she's getting a phone for free for her birthday and doesnt have to a pay a cent. In fact, I bet she still GETS money. But I'm going to have to wait til after my birthday and take all the money I got for Christmas and birthday and report card and baby-sitting to put towards the phone. And then I'll have to get a better job or a dailey sitting business as a Nanny or something so I can pay for the bill. Just writing this makes me want to cry. I'm 14, for crying out loud!!! I shouldnt have to get a job to pay for my cell phone!! Or my tablet, laptop, camera, and clothes. But most of the time I do. And of course nobody is going to hire me because I cant leaglly drive yet and I have "No Experiance". Well you know what? ******** you. Maybe you should give me a chance! I mean, come on! I'm not over-qualified like anybody else who's going to apply for this and I cant just get up and move to another job whenever I want to. Not like i would know where to look for a job, anyway. I think Publix is still on hiring freeze, Ricky no longer owns the Blue Marlin, or else I would already have a job. Nobody wants a 14 y/o as a part-time Nanny or a mother's helper. Animal Shelters have volunteers, so does Mote. Pet Stores are having problems as it is because no one wants to spend money on pet food. Teens hang at malls, not work at them.
Ugh. Dont care anymore. When I was sitting in the tailors, texting Bailey, my phone decided it was tired of me, and stopped texting even though I still had 23 texts left. Which isnt a lot, but still. We're paying for it, we should be able to use it. Well, my dad is paying for it, but whatever. It's only $10 a month. (Damn, it is really hot in here!) So I got the T-mobile website up and he tried to log on but couldnt. So he got all pissed and was yelling at the computer and stuff because he has no patience. Neither does my mom. How I got this infanite amount of patience, I will never know. So he called T-mobile and Dad always says that the reason we have T-mobile is because they had the best customer service. Ha! Bet you're regretting that now, huhn?? And then he got even more pissed and was yelling at the computer and the poor guy on the phone and me and everything. I feel so bad for the dude on the phone, having to deal with s**t all day. This is why I dont like being mean to people (to their face). Being passive-agressive is so much better. Besides, Peter Lee is one of the funniest comics of all time. And he was like "THIS SHOULD WORK BETTER FOR THE PEOPLE WHO CAN'T AFFORD UNLIMITED TEXTING!!!" and I'm thinking "Yeah, Dad. Because our family are the only ones who cant afford it. Of course they wont make it work for just us." Sigh. But we finally got it worked out (of course it's going to screw up again next month) and I only have to wait til January (or March, depending on how much money I have. I dont think I will survive.)
Also, I want a different laptop than the one I told my mom. I decided that a tiny one is crap. I should really starting looking at different ones and tell her this before she gets the great idea of surprising me with one for the begining of the school year....
Okay, so
Mood: Depressed (When am I not?) But not suicidal today, thank gosh. Oh, wait no. I can feel the death thoughts coming again....
Music: Three Days Grace - Pain
Location: My house, in front of the computer (Duh, since I just ranted on lack of phone-internet and lack of a laptop)
Longing: Somebody to post so I can go back into my fantasy world with Hidan; Samsung Vibrant; Laptop; Bailey (I wish we could hang out tomorrow. I also want you to read this...ILY); Lynnlynn (She understands....); Toulouse (too bad it's too hot outside to snuggle him...)
P.S. I really like this Journal thing. I hope to use it more... Even though that makes me sound like a total dork. I also hope someone reads this regularly because I have a feeling it's going to have a suicide note on it after the first day of Highschool when I was crying alone in a corner of the library because my life is crap. I think jumping would be the easiest. Better than struggling while I choke to death in my closet. I think I'd have to jump of the school though. There's a way up to the roof, I'm sure. I'll just have to find it. I wish I could be on meds. Or talk to someone who takes me seriously. But I cant. Because nobody will listen to me. This is why I love the computer. It has no choice but to listen to my rants. And it helps me escape my depressive mind. RPs are better than drugs.
 KhanaHatake1 · Sat Jul 31, 2010 @ 03:45am · 2 Comments |
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