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Lately I've found myself missing something that I never thought I would miss. My old relationship that died over two years ago. I try to stay in touch with my ex as best as I can. granted it helps if he would be wiling to talk with me and it isn't just talking with him that i miss. I miss the relationship. The feelings that I had, and I find myself wishing at times that we could have it again. that we hadn't went our seperate ways. I know there is nothing I can do to change it, but I can't help it. gonk We never got to meet and sometimes I wonder if that would have changed how things went. guess it's one of those things that won't be changed. unless some unknown benefactor grants me like a million dollars. I'd be able to afford the trip to visit them then. *sigh* since I'm not sure that willl ever happen in my life time I guess I just have to hope that maybe something will change sometime and this unsure, wondering, feeling I get some days will be, what returned?, that sounds wrong sweatdrop , figured out? not right either. Realized. That is what I want, and then by the act of fate or destiny or whatever, returned to me and we can be given another chance.

*sigh* don't know if that will ever happen either. I'm not asking for advice, or expecting anyone to post, a lot of people like to read my journals but i get no comments. Ever. Not sure why I pour out my heart. I guess sometimes I just need to hope someone understands and that the right person will see this.