Emo-Rants
Tiffany calls me just to tell me that Sam is moving. Pft, I shouldn't care, should I? Well, I do. His whole family is following him to college. He's leaving and the only thing he had to say to me was "I feel smothered and manipulated."
Never ever did I buy it. Ever. To this day, I still think it's a load of s**t. It just didn't add up. And by golly, he applied to Iowa around that time and starting acting weird...
So here I am, his supposed best-friend; The only person at this school that he actually cared about, or so he led me to believe.
And here he is, going to college. But, unlike planned, his family is following him, therefore leaving me as the only reason for him to come back to Riverdale...
Maybe I think too much? Maybe he was trying to ease me into the fact that I'm never going to see him again? Or, maybe he seriously just doesn't care about me anymore? Sadly, I'm forced to believe the last of those reasons.
Still, I don't know, but for once since this friendship fell apart, I was actually feeling okay. It was okay that he didn't want me, because I don't want someone in my life like that. Bada-bing bada-boom, new information comes up and I start to question the reason...again.
I don't know why, since it doesn't really matter anyway. I guess it just really bothers me not knowing what went wrong. I will never know. It's been proven by his persistence in telling me the same faux line again and again.
Anyhow, they don't seem to be telling people. His sister has been breaking down and her best-friends don't even know why. Then I go again, wondering if Sam told Tiffany knowing she would tell me. If he did, then what does he want; Me to rush to him? Me to not care?
I don't know. Then again, he probably was just telling his 'friends', if you can say that, since she doesn't care to talk to him anymore.
I don't know what he wants, I don't know what he thinks, nor do I care. I don't want his friendship, although a reason for ending it would be nice, and I have given up hope in ever repairing the friendship. You can't mend the fabric of friendship if you're out of thread.
Yeah, it hurts and I'm upset, as you can tell. But no, I'm not upset because he's moving; I'm upset because I will never hear him tell me that he is.
He is the best mistake and the greatest regret I have.
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