|
|
|
I'd like to post some lyrics before I get started on this Entery.... this is from Smile empty Soul - With this knife.
I let myself fall into a Lie,
I let my walls come down,
I let myself Smile and feel alive,
I let my walls come down,
No matter how I try
I dont know why
You push so far away
You wrapped you hands tight around my heart,
You squeezed it full of pain,
With this Knife I'll cut out the part of me
The part that cares for you,
With this Knife i'll cut out the Heart of me
The heart that cares for you.
I realize this song is about a broken relationship, but who says that it has to be between one and their lover? Personally this song holds meaning to how I have been feeling this holiday season, I've thought of you alot dad. I cry myself to sleep at night, wishing you where still with us, and knowing there is nothing I can do to bring you back. We all miss you, and I know mom Is trying very hard.... She over compensated alot for your loss this christmas, Josh and Kendra got basicly anything they desired, when we have always had to scrimp and save our money in the past.
I'm glad they seemed to have a Good christmas, But I would have given it all up to have you back. We may not have gotten along much when you where alive, we are too much alike for our own good, and we both knew it. I was your Daughter, and still am, always will be. I'm trying my best to look after mom and the kids but since my car broke down, the car you helped me buy, the last thing we did together, I dont have a way back and forth from my current residence... I know you wouldnt approve of where im livng, But Dad, Josh is 8 and Kendra is 14, they need seperate rooms, I moved out to give them that space, but in retur sacrifced the roof over my head. Its alright though.....
.... Mom wants to sell the proporty and move out of state, possably out of country, I'd be going with her, but im scared to leave this place behind, its all I have left of you. It's already hard to remember little things about you and its only been 6 months..... Thanksgiving was hard... we cleaned the house and went through alot of your stuff, but even through that I find its hard, and today was even harder... everyone is trying to be happy and Its like im the only one thats sad or depressed, Like im the only one that crys.
I'm Going to light a candle for you on your birthday, You would have been 42.
Love you daddy.
Merry Christmas.
 Shariea · Sat Dec 25, 2004 @ 07:13am · 0 Comments |
|
|
|
|
|
