Welcome to Gaia! :: View User's Journal | Gaia Journals

well, today was.........
the weather was nice, but another one of my brackets came off. there was just a snapping sound when i was asleep. i just fished through my mouth, pulled it out and chucked it on my side table. i was half asleep anyway. i thought it was a dream. but it was there when i woke up. so...whatever. that's three i think. great. three that they have to put on again-
no wait. four. yes, four they have to put on with that disgusting junk again.
i didn't really do anything today... i had homemade waffles for breakfast. they were yummy.
but now i feel sucky. because my dad said i'm scaring him with all my 'black s**t'. i wonder if they went through my hot topic bag..... but everything was there. the gloves fit awesomely, and look very gothic. heart i love them. the earrings are also especially awesome, with all the black skulls and stuff. i can't wait to wear them......... should i save them for semi? ahhh, and i haven't tried out the eye smudge. i think i'll wait for semi, or the concert for the haunted look... i think maybe i should take it slow with my parents so they don't break and freak......... yes, i think i'm not going to break it out until you all come over for the concert. then we can unscrew it together. heart
you know how i told my mum i wanted to paint my walls black? when i got back from val's, she was rambling on on how calming colors were the blue i had, green, and yellow. she looked on the internet, or said she did. BLACK wasn't in there. she seems persistent to prove me wrong, and that this is just a phase. but i never mentioned i wanted 'calming'. if anything, i want conflicting, because all the anger and hollowness pours into my writing and makes it more well-rounded. feelings, any kind of feeling, turns writing into something more. and the blue................. it's just not me anymore.
i shouldn't be complaining, though. randi had pink walls until about a year ago. val still has them and is trying unsuccessfully to work up enough courage to ask for black walls.......
ugh. i wish they'd understand. they were kids once. i keep them happy and have a constant 4.0 grade point average. i love to read. i don't smoke, do drugs, or hang around with the wrong kind of people. and even if i have no big plans for college, i'm still going to force myself to go.
i'm not perfect, but i'm pretty damn close in a parental aspect. so what does it matter if i like a certain color or listen to screaming music? it doesn't.