I miss chesterfield collage,
I feel like my old friends are leaving me behind, your all so happy from what I've seen in the photos and that you've all forgotten about me,
I feel like my old friends from the 'sop are leaving me behind also, I hardly see anyone other then one person, why must I cling?
I feel like I only have a few true friends atm,
I feel like my life is falling apart in front of me and theres nothing I can do,
I feel like a failure,
I feel like I can't match up and that I'm not good enough,
I feel like my family hate me, why must they always give the impression they would be better off without me?
I feel like I've come in last place to those that don't deserve the first.


I feel like I have let my Mother down,
I feel like most people would be better off without me, I hinder and rag people down,
I feel like I don't want to post this,
I feel like a fool,
I feel like someone els,
I feel like I'm self-destructive,
I feel like talking to my Father and telling him what he's done to me by messing around in my life, I don't need a ******** part time Dad, you wasn't there when it mattered, you wasn't there when I needed you, Why did he not want me?
I feel like I owe my (step)Dad a thank you, you truly are the Father figure I need to keep my life on track,
I feel like I've gone on far to long but have only just started,

I don't know if anyone will read all of this, and I don't care, I just needed to get it off my chest, I cried through out this, which is good, I haven't been able to do that for a long time.



Well this is me signing out.