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Dear Diary, Today I...*scribble scribble* BOREDOM!
PWNED!
me: your mum read you bedtime stories
will: your mum checks under your bed for the boogeyman smile
me: your mum buys blue pads
will: your mum wears red pads
me: your mum is going to watch bandslam just to watch the new moon sneak peek
will: your mum had to be in bandslam so see the new moon trailer
me: your mum waited at walmart until 12 to get the twilight DVD
will: your mum shut down walmart so she could steal the dvd
me: your mum steals my jokes.your mum held edward hostage to the twilight DVD
will: your mum bought her jokes. she had to suck bella's blood to get the dvd
me: your mum sucks bella's monthly blood to get the DVD
will: your mum played baseball with alice to get the dvd
me: your mu rides motorcycles with jacob to get the DVD
will: your mum took bella's place in the movie to get the dvd
me: your mum posted an ad in the yellow pages that said: "wanted: edward cullen, if found call me
will: your mum used james to find edward cullen
me: your mum registered into forks high school to get to edward...she got rejected
will: you mum was a teacher at forks high...thats why edwards rejected her
me: your mum is your mum. that's why edward rejected her
will: your mum was edwards mum...that's why he rejected her
me: your mum crossed genetics with a spider-monkey so she could ride on edwards back, she got rejected
will: your mum turned into a vampire so she could be the "sparkle" in edwards eyes but still got rejected
me: your mum whitening lotion and glues glitter onto herself because edwards refused to maker her into a vampire.
will: your mum didn't need to use glitter cuz either way edward didn't see her as his own brand heroin
me: your mum smokes heroin to get to edward, but he rejected her
will: your mum smoked the wrong brand of heroin thats why edward rejected her
me: your mum grows the wrong brand of heroin, thats why edward rejected her
will: your mum bought the heroin seeds at the 99 cents store that why edward rejected her
me: your mum bought heroin from you, thats why edward rejected her
will: your mum use heroin when you were in the womb thats why the heroin you gave her was defective
******
sarah: your mum smokes weed!
me: your mum doesn't need to smoke cuz it's like she already does
sarah: your mum is so black she caused a blackout
me: your mum is so black it's night time every second at your house (i'm not racist)
sarah: your mum is so lame she steals my jokes!
me: your mum is so lame she uses old jokes!
your mum is so saddening she can't think of good jokes
me: your mum goes to fmylife.com to talk about you
sarah: your mum is so hairy she has afros on her nipples
me: your mum is so ugly they think she's a new type of species
sarah: roses are red violets are blue God made me pretty what happened to you
me: God made me gorgeous that's what happened!
sarah: roses are red violets are blue when i flush the toilet i think of you
me: roses are red violets are blue when TU is mine i'll be laughing at you!
sarah: last time i checked you had pimples
me: last time i checked you're celebrating halloween
***
me: your mum googles on how to make edward cullen hers. nothing comes up because edward blocked her
will: your mum was on the computer but edward sent her a virus so she could stop finding ways to get to edward
me: your mum is a virus that's why edward rejected her
will: your mum gave edwards a virus that why carlisle had to suck his blood to keep him alove
me: your mum drinks packets of ketchup
will: your mum uses ketchup for a blood transfusion
me: your mum donated ketchup to the blood bank
will: your mum was fired from the blood bank cuz she thought that some of the blood was ketchup and used it with fren fries
me: you mum has a restriction order to stay away from the blood bank
will: because of the restriction order, your mum had to hire someone to go in and get the blood she needed to save her leg from amputation
me: no one would help your mum in stopping from getting amputated cuz they wouldn't want her following them around
will: your mum wouldn't want you to get the blood for her cus she was too tired following and sping on you trying to figure out where you were at night
me: your mum saw you at the night club while she was working the pole and you gave her 20 bucks
will: your mum saw you working your corner so she decided to go around back and got you a drug addict for FREE
me: your mum works the corner and you almost bought her
will: your mum had to buy you off the corner before the cops came and locked you up
me: your mum left you at the corner because she wanted you away from home and in jail instead
will: your mum saw in the same cell cuz she was caught by cops getting some from her husband in the corner by your house
me: your mum was in jail so many times they just decided to giver her a license to work the corner so they wouldn't have to see her again
will: our mum passe the license onto you to keep her legacy going
me: your mum does it in your room when she gets someone from working her corner
will: your mum uses your house for a stop and go service
me: instead of men paying your mum, your mum pays them to do her. your almost bankrupt!
will: your mum took money from your college funds to keep her business going
me: you never had college funds to begin with so you decided to work for her by playing romantic music with your instrument while they got busy so you could earn money
will: unfortunately you were so bored you decided to visit the business to spice up your life
me: she has creative moves and skills until i found out you taught her those things and even criticized her through our criteria of how it should be done with a man. so i left
will: your mum went to you for moves later and her business boomed!
me: heck yeah! LOL! i'm stopping the conversation cuz i need to do hw hahaha! XP
......
will: your mum freaks on the dance floor at the retirement home
me: your mum sleeps with the elders at the retirement home
will: your mum gave birth to an elderly person
me: your mum gave birth to you that's sad enough so she posted it on fmylife.com
will: you mum made fmylife.com cuz she found out you were related to her
me: your mum hires people to be your friends so she wouldn't always have to see you
will: your mum works for me
me: your mum want to disown you
will: your mum already disowned you, you just never knew it
me: your mum is not your mum she found you on the street

so...who wins?





 
 
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