Today's entry is a bit late. I intended to post on Friday, but that didn't happen because I ended up babysitting. It was late and short notice, but I need the money and I sort of owe it to them. Yesterday I couldn't because I was out shopping all day for my dad's birthday presents. His birthday is today. Now so much time has gone by that I'm not sure if I remember all the details completely. My memory isn't the best, but I'll try to get it all out and making sense.
I'll start with Friday's events. Friday was an assembly day, so our classes were shortened and we all got out early. Since our assemblies(sp?) aren't mandatory, my friends and I usually hang out at the park across the parking lot untill the busses come and it's time for us to go home. Well, that day I had to wait for everyone by the flagpole. We were missing two friends. I knew where one was, but the other hadn't said anything about her plans for after school. We don't usually meet by the flagpole, we meet on a corner of the school we call THE corner, because everyone we know meets there. I decided to walk down to the corner to check and see if maybe she thought we would be there. When I get there, my friend is not there, but guess who is. The Everpresent He is standing on the corner he KNOWS I meet everyone at. I was suprised so I stopped and went "Hello" out of reaction. He looks at me like he's saying Oh no, not you again. and goes "Hi". His voice was cold and distant, quite unlike the voice he used for the talk we had in my previous entry.
I poked around at everyone else for awhile, avoiding Everpresent He, then I jumped on the nice guy person's shoulders and had him carry me to the park. After awhile there, one of my friends and I decided to check the corner again in case our missing friend was just a little late. When we get there, Everpresent He is gone. I assumed he just went home. There was still no sign of our friend and no one had seen her so we started back and ran into the random person who gave Everpresent He a note to give to me. We talked to him for a bit, then went back to the park. It was time to go soon and we started for the busses. For me to get to my bus I have to pass by the corner again, and when I did Everpresent He was standing there in the same spot again, as if he had never left. I tried to walk by without even looking at him, but I couldn't help it. I turned around and walked up to him and put my head on his shoulder. He put an arm around me and rested his head on mine. It felt like a distant sort of hug, just to get me to go away. He asked me how I was and I was in the middle of responding when my friend pulled me away. I appreciate her concern and her trying to help me out by keeping him away, but it made her seem something like my mom's little nazi or something.
Later that day I called my old friend from 7th grade, whom Everpresent He is trying to get to go out with him. She said he had been acting all nice to her, carrying her books and walking her to classes and to her bus. I had completely forgotten that he used to walk me to the bus. Now I'm mad at him for a reason I had completely forgotten about. She said she would not go out with him. Im not sure if it's just for my sake or if she really doesn't like him that way, but it makes me feel slightly better. What I don't understand is why now has he decided he likes her? He has known her since freshmen year, a whole year before he met me, and he never had any interest in her untill now. Also, why does he say he cares abot me and acts all kind and stuff, then he suddenly turns into this guy who couldn't care less if I died right in front of him? What is friends to him? WHY THE HELL DOES HE KEEP GOING AFTER PEOPLE WHO ARE SUPPOSED TO BE MY FRIENDS, ESPECIALLY THE ONES FROM THE SEVENTH GRADE??? WHY???? First Jessica Grey, now this one! WHY!?!?
View User's Journal
My brain makes words.
If I need to talk but have no one to talk to or I feel I need to write through my problems, it goes here. I do not use names. If I do, it's because I either have no respect for the person, or I accidentally slipped.
 |
