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I find it.. utterly amazing that someone I loved with all of my heart died and I felt no remorse. They said to me that they were going to and I tried so hard to stop it but it happened anyway, and still.... I felt no sadness. I mean I miss them yeah but I just feel no loss. Maybe it is because I finally found something inside me that I thought needed more? Maybe I finally have some plan set for myself? Either way I, myself, don't know the answer. Maybe it wasn't love.. then what was the feeling inside of me everytime I heard their voice? Why did I want to spend my life with them? Emotions are... strange aren't they? You think you know how you are going to react and.... you end up feeling completely different. Maybe we... just don't know ourselves like we think we do... Maybe... maybe our feelings are a mystery to ourselves. Maybe...