I find myself almost addicted to the computer lately. Not even really doing anything, just sitting in front of it, bored as s**t.
I can't think of a damned thing to do, and it's always late as hell, with no one on, that I do this.
Not only this, but the fact that I get on so damned late is effing with my classwork. I can't concentrate, I can't hardly even think. This boredom is pressing me from all sides, with nowhere I can go. Nothing I can do.
About the only people I talk to anymore is my latest girlfriend, and that's pretty much ******** it. I want to organize something, something that I and what friends I still know well can all go do, but I can't think of a damned thing, and when I do think of something, I realize I have no idea how to go about making sure it happens, making sure every one of them knows, making sure every one of them can go, and making sure all of them can get back home. It's like I need to know all their schedules a freaking month(or more, even!) in advance. I dunno whether it's just me becoming soft/weak, or if it actually is getting harder.
But...I fully intend to end this bullshit. I'm tired of being bored. I'm tired of felling left out of things. I'm tired of being stuck in this god-forsaken house, sitting in front of a computer with nothing more to to than gradually and slowly get fatter and fatter(not that I am yet, but I feel like I am, which is about the same, to me.), and most of all, I am [******** TIRED of feeling so god-damned lonely and friendless!
I know I am not, but the feeling persists anyways! I just wanna grab it by the throat, say, "Hey, you. [********] you, you," and punch the hell out of it, right in the face!
Aaaand now ADD kicks in, letting me know that there is a bug smacking into the light fixture.
Aaaand it's not a bug hitting the light fixture. It's a small snake, wrapped around it, and trying to eat a fly that is smacking into the light fixture. I'ma take care of that.
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