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it was very odd...totally unexpected. i got up today and was getting dressed and stuff when the phone rings. i was like "what the ******** is the phone ringing for at 10am?!" heh heh i dont normally get up so early. it ended up being for me O.O...the home phone was for me....it was my friends...not just one but a few...form long ago when i was still sweet...like 2 years ago or something lol. they asked why i hadn't called in so long and said they missed me and were worried...like they cared....i was so shocked and happy but sad too. they were calling me on their way to school so we didnt talk for long...just long enough for them to tell me i should call them all......

i thought they didnt want me anymore...i thought cause i was so far away it wouldn't matter if i just stopped calling after a while....they really never call me so i figured they wouldn't care or something...i mean im so annoying and sad all the time. if i was them i wouldn't want to talk to me....damn...i ******** hate how everything makes me want to cry lately heh ******** emotion lol