You put things to the back of your mind, because that's the only way you can deal with them-even though it's not really dealing. You let it simmer, put it on the back burner, or whatever other cooking analogy you want to use.
but the more you hear about it, the harder it is to ignore, to just keep a clean and open mind. To have faith that everything will work out in the end. As beautiful a thing as faith is, sometimes logic can brutally murder it.
Hearing more facts you do not want to hear, like nails in your own coffin. Your heart sinks in your chest with the slighetest of aches, as if it is yelping in pain but afraid of yelling out. You want to cry. Not a sobbing cry, just a release from all the built up emotions that you've been letting simmer. You want the tears to run down your face, silently, conceeding how you feel. Cry as beauftifully as the faith you've been hoping would pull through.
Though you cannot cry, can you? Why should you cry over something so small, no matter how it moves you? The wave of emotion may hit you, but it cannot overcome. The tears brim your eyes, blurring everything in sight. But you do not let them spill over. Keep you eyes open so the tears receed. Back to the corners of your mind with your worries. Look above you to dry you eyes, and find yourself looking at your faith.
I guess it doesn't matter today.
 Qua Quidam · Wed Aug 13, 2008 @ 05:34am · 1 Comments |
