((My paranioa... sweatdrop which I will call it for now... seems to tell me that another girl has a thing for my bf. The first time it wasn't a big deal. She wanted him to walk with her, but I raced behind, showing I was there. Normally I wouldn't even be concerned, but they've known eachother longer, so I feel like... I don't know. But here's what made my hair stand on the back of my neck and my stomache churn... He's visiting me at work, I'm exuberantly happy that he's there... and she hugs him. burning_eyes I really wanted to point out, 'hey, its the gf right here. you are hugging my bf, and it breaks me on the inside to see that.' emo It may be just a hug to most. I mean, it's not like she kissed him or anything, but it was painful. I don't think she means anything by it though. She's a good person as far as I know. sweatdrop I guess even her name puts me backward. It's the same as my traitor. I never thought I would have to worry about my paranoia, in this case jelousy. gonk Scorpio rising is big on jealousy and possessiveness, sadly. Now that I think of it, I wonder if he has to deal with jealousy too? If so, he hides it well. As for me, I was obvious. I wasn't even trying to hide it either. It bugged me for the rest of the day. She hugged him? They're friends, I guess it's fine... but... neutral I don't want him to feel he can't be with his friends either. I mean... almost all my friends are guys. I'm just not one for human contact unless it's my bf. Perhaps that is why I'm so offended by her approach to him.
I asked Fuzzy whether or not she had a boyfriend, hoping he would say yes. He didn't know so I continued, noting my problem. It was actually an idea that he would laughingly raise the subject to Rikki, bringing awareness. I never thought he would give good advice. Here's what he said: "Why do you need to worry? Rikki loves you. Not her." I felt silly for jumping to conclusion, but the image still haunts me. Is it even necessary for her to hug him? I guess I would feel better if I didn't have to see it. I'm ashamed to have such emotions. I love him so dearly I don't want anyone to think they can move in on my territory. Am I selfish?))
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