|
Okay...everyone, ignore my entry about my hating everyone and everything. I shall revise it right now.
I now know that people are a little too plastic. I shouldn't trust just anyone anymore. And I also shouldn't care so much about just anyone either. I don't have anymore space for that bullshit. From now on, people have to show me that I can trust them. This explains my bitchy-ness recently.
Situation that triggered this:
~I would often bring my diskman to school to keep me busy and awake. My classmate Chester would usually borrow it when I wouldn't be using it. Later on, I played my FOB CD which he used to borrow along with my diskman. He'd listen to it with Keifer, another classmate of mine, who would also borrow my diskman when no one had been using it. I got to track 4, Sugar We're Going Down, and it started to jump. I took out the CD to check if it was damaged and scratched...it wasn't...but I still blame the two of them for its damage. I therefore did not want to risk the safety of either my CDs or my diskman, so I didn't let them borrow the diskman anymore.
Keifer asked if he could borrow it this morning. I told him no. Then later in the afternoon, Chester asked me today if he could borrow it. I told him no. James, that ******** up b*****d who bought a new MP3 player to show it off and gain popularity points, was nearby. Chester, being the ******** up retard he is, insulted me in a mockingly manner and went to James to ask if he could borrow James' MP3 player. James OBVIOUSLY overheard...being such a gay eavesdropper. So he let Chester borrow it. Chester then insulted me some more, saying something with the concept of "In with James; Out with Me." Very nice...b*****d... To let my anger out, I scoffed at James' idotic plasticity, and I told Chester to shut up and a very nice "******** you" to his face.~
Next thing what ruined my day:
~I had to stay late at school to prepare Petri plates for my groupmates for our practical exam in streaking. I loathe staying late at school. This time it was more violent of me...and I won't say anything about it... stare Well, what pissed me off first was that Kent didn't exactly help so much in the preparation of the plates. I can excuse Abbie for not helping because she was taking the retest in Physics. I should've been taking it as well, but I had no clue there was going to be one, so I wasn't exactly ready for it. I asked him for some surgical gloves. We had none, and he told me to clean the Petri plates with my bare hands. And, if you don't know, I had made some streaking on those plates. I did each of the four plates. Yes...very VERY helpful groupmates. But then again, we're all equal -- Abbie does the writing of the reports; as for Kent, I'm not so sure about what he does. I am the person who performs the tasks, and I enjoy it, and I don't loathe it so much. I had to remove the disgusting (and horrible smelling...and pathogenic) agar from the plate and clean it off. He did that. And I really hate cleaning those thigns without gloves on, knowing I'm dealing with pathogens, a horribly dirty sink teeming with microorganisms I'm not sure about which smells awful, and liquid Lysol. Liquid Lysol does bad things to my hands...the only good thing is its disinfecting power. I only got as far as getting the plates through the autoclave process, and I had to go home since it was getting late -- it was 4:50pm.~
Next thing that ruined my day...and I was emotionally vulnerable by this time...it made me cry:
~I came home really late. I don't remember what time I arrived home, but it was I think a quarter past six. Yeah, a quarter past six. I had text messaged my mother at around ten minutes to 6 that I was on my way home, knowing that they tend to worry by 6pm and I wasn't home yet. I arrived at home and met with Mom, and she wasn't mad at all. I went through our storefront to our house and found Dad at the table having his supper. He stood up and asked me why I was late. I told him that I had to do my Microbiology task at school. He didn't exactly buy it. He scoffed and told me things like "Yeah, stay at school longer," implying that I like staying at school. Why would I? I hope my boyfriend is online everytime I get home, even though he hasn't for weeks, I try to catch Inuyasha at 5:30 as much as I can (like, everyday...), and I felt so tired that I just wanted to get home and get some rest. That's just...bullshit...~
Next thing that...well, I don't know how to explain it -- if it's more of a positive thing or a negative thing...one thing's for sure...it made me cry some more:
~I got two offline messages from my beloved boyfriend, sent at 2:45pm. FINALLY. Now I feel better to know he's alive and alright...well, pretty much alright. Then...he doubtfully asks about how true I think I am...I don't know what answer to give him, since I've said the same thing over and over again -- That I am faithful, and true, and real, and honest, and...everything else. I have not left him, and my love for him hasn't faded a bit. In the next message, he say something like me having Morgan. Now what the ******** is up with that...that's bullshit... Look. When I feel bad and tripping, I don't flirt at all. On the other hand, YOU do. If you haven't really noticed that. You go and flirt when you feel doubt, as if you're finding some kind of back-up plan type of thing that when I dump you (which is NEVER gonna happen), you'll have other chicks to try your luck on. That's what came to mind first. But it's what you do, Lover. The back-up plan thing is bullshit. I've burned that idea. But the fact that...you don't exactly fight for me...just hurts...you say such things to get me going...to make me regret...to make me think I have done something wrong...when the truth is, I have done you no wrong... You make me feel guilty for no reason...that just upsets me. You say things like that, as if you could dump me anytime and get over me easily. Hey...you ARE the ultimate charmer. It's simple for you to score a shot. No offense in anything I'm saying here...I'm just making my point...~
Next thing that kinda annoyed me:
I had to make some more copies of the labels for the bottles of Mom's water deliveries...I just despise making them... stare
And...I think that's all...a simple ******** day... stare
 Mary Hiryu · Mon Oct 02, 2006 @ 01:04pm · 0 Comments |
