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My everyday thoughts...
My Journal is my deeply thought over view of the world with it's every imperfection and many marvelous wonders...
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I thought my boyfriend was my knight in shining armor... but he turned out to be my dork in aluminum foil!




And most of all I love my amazing boyfriend AJ. We haven't been together long, and even if we tiff sometimes no matter what it'll work out. Being in his arms is so perfect... nothing makes me happier. He's the kind of flawless I wish I could be... He's the only one that's got enough of me to break my heart, and the funny thing is, I'm not scared, not even a little bit.... not even at all.




My secret heart



I wish that everyone could feel,

The happiness that I do,

The happiness that you bring to me,

In each way that you do,



And through all of the struggles,

Through all the twists and turns,

We somehow stay together,

We grow from each other and learn,



Our love has blossomed over time,

Like a lovely red bud tree,

It grows and then it flowers,

Just like you and me,



I can't say all I feel for you,

If I had years to write it down,

I'd finish writing and realize,

Just how much I'd left out,



So I write you a little poem,

To show you how much I care,

To wrap my love around your soul,

And always keep it there,



You'll remember I once told you,

That you are my heart,

That you consume every piece of me,

Every single part,



And I can say that it's still true,

You are every part,

Of something else more special,

My true and secret heart,



I have two hearts although it's strange,

Yes two hearts it is true,

One heart for everybody else,

And one heart just for you,



My heart for you beats with love,

With passion and with fire,

It beats with hopes and dreams,

It beats with truth and desire,



But most of all it beats for you,

Thumping in my chest,

Filling me with so many emotions,

I can't find the words to express,



I know that I must tell you,

Right now I realize,

That all your love for me,

Is shining in your eyes,



I guess that's why they sparkle,

I guess that's why they glow,

Because they're filled with secret love,

That no one can ever know,



And I guess that it's ok with me,

That the world cannot know,

I see it every time,

Your eyes sparkle and glow,



So just shut your eyes,

Hear the beating start,

The beating of,

My secret heart.







I love you so much Aj and I know that you love me. No matter what happens we will get through it... together.




A poem for you baby


A poem for my lover,

A poem from my soul,

A poem filled with love,

A love only we know,

A poem for my boyfriend,

A poem from my heart,

My heart you fill,

And would never tear apart,

A poem for my friend,

A poem from my thoughts,

My thoughts that you consume,

And the joy you have brought,



You see right through the phasad that I show,

Even when I lie,

And say nothing... you know,

I don't know how you do it,

I can't run from the secrets,

Somehow I open up and tell you,

All of my regrets,

No one has ever,

Done that before,

Seen through my soul,

And loved me more,

No one has touched my heart,

In the way that you do,

And no one can ever,

Know me like you,

It's so remarkable,

The beauty you see,

When I'm crying and broken,

You see beauty in me,

And I in turn see such beauty in you,

I see light,

And goodness,

In all that you do,

To tell you the truth,

As I always do,

Each time I think,

I think of you,

You wrap your arms around me,

Even when you're not there,

You hold me and love me,

And you always care,

You fill my life with happiness,

Something I've never had before,

Somehow when I'm with you,

I don't feel sad anymore,

You wash it all away,

My pain, my loss, my sorrow,

You make each day beautiful,

So that I crave each tomarrow,

I wake up and feel you,

And I smile and sigh,

Knowing that you,

Are a part of my life,

Then I stand up and dress,

Go to school and come home,

Knowing that you're with me,

And I'm never alone,

I just want to thank you,

For all that you've done,

But most of all I thank you,

For giving me your love.


For my loving boyfriend:






Although sometimes it seems that I don't care about you because I get grouchy sometimes, I want to assure you that this isn't true. I care for you deeply and I hope you know how wonderful you have been to me. I can't believe I found someone that is so connected to my soul. I hope that you feel the same way about me, and I know what we have is beautiful, just like the way you look at me. I love you so much and I am so thankful to have you in my life.







This is a poem I wrote for my boyfriend, because I'm just a poet like that! LOL I hope you all like it.



I'm here for you:



I just wanted you to know,
That I'm here for you,
Till the shadow passes,
And there is no tomarrow,
Till the summers leave us,
Till the night consumes us,
Till the flowers in bloom,
No longer blush,
Till the nights are cold,
Till the world is dead,
Till there are no breaths,
From our corpses in bed,
In the thick of the thickest,
And the thin of the thinnest,
Till the times we have shared,
Are lost in remembrance,
Till the sun no longer shines,
Till the wind no longer blows,
I'll be here for you always,
And always love you so,
If you ever need me,
Just call out my name,
I'll be right beside you,
Through the darkness and pain,
Till you're happy again,
Till the light shines through,
Till you remember,
That I'm always here for you,
Till your heart fills with warmth,
With life and memories,
Of the love that was shared,
Between you and me,
Till your mind is clear,
Till your soul starts to sing,
Till you feel all the goodness,
And joy that you bring,
To the loved ones around you,
To the memories that grow,
With each passing day,
That you remember and know,
That I'm always here for you,
And I'm not the only one,
Who's heart you have touched,
And who's dreams you've begun,
So remember please remember,
That I'm on your side,
Even if in time,
We say goodbye,
Even if we part,
Even if we cry,
I'll be here for you,
Till the day that I die.





I love my boyfriend Andrew James Cruce so much. He's such a beautiful person and he makes me feel so loved and cherished. I know that what we have is so special and it is an intimacy that I always dreamed of having with someone but never could create. It's far more than physical; like so many relationships are these days. Each moment we spend together is so perfect and I'm so thankful to have someone so perfect in my life.... Someone who sees me for who I am and loves everything about me... And loves me as much as I love him.



I wrote these poems for him about 5 days ago and I sent them to him. I hope you all enjoy my kissy-kissy goo goo love fest! PDA ROX!



I will love you forever:

I love you so deeply,
I love you so much,
I love the sound of your voice
And the way that we touch.
I love your warm smile
And your kind, thoughtful way,
The joy that you bring
To my life every day.
I love you today
As I have from the start,
And I'll love you forever
With all of my heart.

What I put to verse:

The boundaries of pen and page,
Is my everlasting curse,
For I cannot express the things,
I easily put to verse,
I can write them and I can type them,
But somehow I can't seem to say,
The feelings welling in my heart,
I feel for you each day,
So forgive me if I don't utter,
All the things you know I feel,
But does my lack of saying it aloud,
Make it any less real?
So parden all the poetry,
That I adress to you,
But it is the only way that I,
Can show my love for you,
And if you don't believe me,
Then read this one more time,
My heart, my love, my poetry,
What you are to me is in the rhyme.

My heart,

You always seem to listen,
You always seem to hear,
My torment and my tears,
My sorrows and my fears,
You're the only one,
The only one who sees me,
The only one that cares,
The only one that believes me,
You're the only one,
That makes me feel free,
From the darkness of my prison,
The prison of my family,
And when I thought that I'd given up,
When I thought I was through,
Your love touched me in the darkness,
Seeming to say "I hear you",
You saw my loneliness,
You filled my emptiness,
You healed my broken heart,
So long torn apart,
I believed I couldn't love,
Someone for the fear,
That they would get hurt,
Just for being here,
But somehow you changed my thoughts,
You opened my mind,
You opened,
My heart,
You chased back the shadows,
You cared from the start,
You're so perfect,
You are my heart.

Love Is:

Love is the greatest feeling,
Love is like a play,
Love is what I feel for you,
Each and every day,
Love is like a smile,
Love is like a song,
Love is a great emotion,
That keeps us going strong,
I love you with my heart,
My body and my soul,
I love the way I keep loving,
Like a love I can't control,
So remember when your eyes meet mine,
I love you with all my heart,
And I have given you my soul,
Right from the very start.

What we are together:

It's so much more than intimate,
It's so much more than caring,
It's so much more than being brave,
It's so much more than daring,
It's so much more than physical,
It's so much more than sweet,
It's so much more than having to,
It's so much more than need,
It's so much more than feeling,
It's so much more than hugging,
It's so much more than holding,
It's so much more than loving,
And I have to tell you,
I didn't expect to feel,
Such strong feelings for someone,
So soon and so real,
I never thought that I,
Could touch a heart so pure,
To know that I can stay with you,
And not want anything more,
I never dreamed that I,
Could care for you so much,
To relish in your kisses,
And savor every touch,
I never imagined I,
Could be with someone so real,
To write a thousand pages,
And not cover all I feel,
I never knew a love like this,
So heartfelt and so sweet,
I think that it was more than fate,
That we somehow managed to meet.



Yep that's basically it, Baby I love you so much!



Shay Shay,

XOXO





 
 
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